Another chapter closed.

2012. In some ways, it was the most life-changing year of my life. So many places, so many faces, so many new, strange, unique, and completely God-made experiences! Those are the memories I want to keep forever. Others, like breakups with friends, hurt and distrust--I've buried. I've surrendered to my Jesus. And that's the miracle of 2012; learning the true meaning of complete surrender.  I'm done with worrying about living my life according to other people's standards; I am me. And I must follow His perfect, unique path for my future.

{via}

That's 2013. An adventure into the unknown. Pages--like my heart put into poetry--blank and waiting to be filled by the Master of life. Aside from the SAICFF (more on that in a minute) I don't have many plans. . . .and it's a little frightening. My heart left the Shire and my comfortable Hobbit hole long ago; The World is Ahead!

{via}

2012. 

--my 21st birthday.  if i could stop time (because seriously, i'm getting old!) i'd stay right here. 21 is somewhere between maturing-young-adult and little girl who doesn't NEED (or want) to grow up. . .yet. and i'm happy that way. 22 will be great, i'm sure. . .but after 22 comes 23. . .then jumps to 25. and right now i don't even want to think 30. (Peter Pan, i'll always love you!) the interesting part of turning 22 is that i'll be celebrating it in TX. and i've already gotten a Kindle Fire HD as an early birthday gift. which is pretty awesome. :)

{taken in MI by my friend Danielle} 

--attended the 2012 San Antonio Independent Christian Film Festival with a whole crew-ful of beautiful people. we drove alll the way from Ohio, and while i'll admit that overnight road-trips and i don't get along, it was one of the best experiences of my life! we sang, talked non-stop, rarely slept, ate nothing but sandwiches, granola bars, and M&M's, cried, laughed, debated, nearly lost the ball-bearings on a tire, stayed overnight in a parking lot (while said tire was being repaired,) ate more M&M's, watched countless movies, sang some more, met hundreds upon hundreds of people, talked a lot, had the van window broken into, danced, ate a few more granola bars, and bonded in the deepest way possible. i love my friends.

--drove down to Branson MO for Vision Forum's Titanic 100. it was a gorgeous event, full of speeches, special music, and a 3-course dinner on the showboat Branson Belle. plus Anna and I got to spend it with our daddy. :)

--lost my precious Banjo-man Nick in June. as some of you probably remember, Nick was the Yorkie i got as a therapy dog--at least, that's what i hoped he'd become. it's still very difficult for me to talk about, and i try NOT to think. putting down my puppy was the worst thing i've ever done--one of the hardest, most challenging decisions of my life. i went through a lot of guilt. i cried until my TMJ flared and my throat was sore. but now, looking back, weighing the facts, and through lots of support from my family, friends, and prayer, i know my decision was the right one.

{Nick in his Christmas jammies, about five months before he died}

i miss you, little buddy. thanks for leaving your squeaky-puppy for me to snuggle. it smells like you, and whenever i see it, i see YOU, scampering in the backyard with your beautiful, silky coat, floppy ears, and a mouthful of squeaky-puppy. ♥

". . .because I knew you. . .I have been changed for good." 

--spent over 2 months sewing a ballgown and all the trimmings for Beyond the Mask, an Independent Christian film by Burns Family Studios. Though extremely challenging, (think layer upon layer of clothing--all authentic, hand-drafted re-productions) working with the Ohio branch of the BTM costume team was hugely rewarding! i learned so much, and while i'm STILL not an expert seamstress. . .the seam-ripper and i aren't on the friendliest terms anymore. WIN! 

 

{sneak-peak of my finished gown. the second picture is post-huge hairstyle. :P }

--went on an epic week-long vacation to North Carolina and my forever-beloved Tennessee. ok, so i had the worst head-cold of my life (curse you, sun-poisoning!) and hardly remember anything about Dollywood. . .but swimming for the first time ever in the real-life Atlantic ocean was total bliss. if that's what you'd like to call being knocked over by every single wave. it's what you get at 4'9. ;)  i loved exploring the tiny, secluded island of Baldhead--where Blackbeard and other pirates supposedly roamed, once upon a time--in a golf cart. that is, Blackbeard wasn't in a golf cart. we were. oh my, but all the little golf-cart garages! sooo adorable. i want one. 

 

  

things to remember on vacation: always, always, ALWAYS wear sunscreen on the beach. otherwise ones knees are prone to turning bright-pink and hurting horribly. and ones face may turn red. and one may get a horrible head-cold. and then one may not be able to properly enjoy cabins-in-the-Smokies and hillbilly bluegrass jams across the NC/VA border. word to the wise.

  

  

{pics by Anna}

--saw my friends and Celtic band The High Kings in concert. again. That makes 7 concerts now. 

 

 {R-Darren (my favorit-est King) gives the BEST squishy-daddy hugs. he's an absolute sweetheart.}

--went to a rodeo for the first time. as in bull-riding. yes, i'm addicted. 

{by Anna}

--lived through another Ohio Summer Rendezvous! it was my third year as main event planner and hostess, and thanks to my co-planners-in-crime, OSR '12 was truly the best yet. 

--worked with the (MI branch) BTM Costume team AND appeared as an extra in the masquerade ball scene. see, this is why i haven't put up a proper BTM post. there was so much beauty in the 9 days we worked in MI, it can't be put into words.

sewing until 7:30 AM. . . root-beer floats at all hours of the night, deadlines, colds, eating way too much, laughing our heads off. seeing set for the first time! o.O i won't even TRY to explain. let's put it this way--i am an incredibly blessed girl. i have bonded with the most incredible people in all the world. i have lived in a household of crazy-amazing young ladies. i have BEEN IN A MOVIE.

and i was hugged twice by John Rhys-Davies. 

the end.

i can't wait to see what God does with BTM--it's hugely fascinating, watching the Independent film movement revolutionize the world.  

{pics my Anna}

to my Beyond the Mask family:

"Now we're back to the beginning

It's just a feeling and no one knows yet

But just because they can't feel it too

Doesn't mean that you have to forget

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger

'Till they're before your eyes

You'll come back when they call you

No need to say goodbye

You'll come back when they call you

No need to say goodbye".

you have no idea how much you mean to me. i love each and every one of you--for your uniqueness, your spirit and love for the Lord. for your purpose and oneness of mind. for embracing me in your circle, even though i knew you for only 9 days. thank you so much! 

{copyright Joe Henline}

And now stretches this white, empty canvas--this thing called 2013. Already I see so many changes. Watching my "little sisters grow up, for example. how does that happen? just a couple weeks ago I had a deep heart-to-heart with my 15 year old sister Julia. Once these chats were secluded to the "older set". Julia isn't a little girl anymore. I've seen--and am seeing--her blossom into a young lady who is smart, thoughtful, sincere, and in ways very above me in maturity. That girl is going to teach me a lot, I can tell. 

{our parents. i'm assuming dad got wet from the fountain. ;) } 

{L-R: me, Julia, Maria, Lidia, Anna}

2013. Who are you? So far we've seen The Hobbit together, I've booked tickets to the SAICFF 2013, I'm turning 22. . .and everything stops there.

Write upon these pages Lord. Make them Yours. I give them to YOU.

{Titanic 100!}

My lame attempt at chronicling our weekend in MO. {case of writers-block.} Try to make it to the end, because I have some special blog-announcements. Might make reading all this jabber worth-while.    

Vacation withdrawals, remembering Texas, aching for just one more road trip. . .It was the showboat that did it. I mean, Anna and I have always been huge history buffs, and the story of Titanic is one of our most favorites. . . (at one point in time we knew all the names of the crew and passengers. Past tense. Hey, we were homeschooled. ;) ) But I didn't think it could work--I mean, we just came back from the SAICFF. . .another trip, NOW? Two poor, part-time nannies. . .road-tripping all over the country. You get the idea.

 

Then we saw the advertising--for the amazing gala evening on the showboat Branson Belle. I fell in love right then. And we stretched every last penny to MAKE it happen. Our dad came along. Btw, in case I've never mentioned {which I have, but I'll say it again,} I love going on vacation with my dad. He works 6 days a week, so trips like these are really special dad-daughter times. Plus he's a lot of fun and doesn't mind eating tons of sugar and fried food.

Branson is a strange city. Reminds me of Niagara Falls, Canada, only ten times bigger. An entire city full of wax museums and shows that didn't "make it" in the real world. ;) Not my style. Except for the Titanic museum. Naturally. But anyway. . .We were worried about dad driving all the way {shhh. . .don't tell, but neither of his adult daughter drive. o.O} sooo we hitched a ride with some friends, part of the same group we traveled to TX with, in fact. Gabe and Levi {the fellows wearing the kilts in the photo waay below,} were personally asked by Mr. Phillips to play the bagpipes for the event.

 

There has been some controversy as to why so many people (considering there were similar events held globally,) "celebrated" such a tragic event in history. In plain, simple words, we commemorated--paid tribute--to the 15,000 people who gave their lives--woman and children included. No morbid celebration of death. Whatever your political view of the sinking of the Titanic, I believe the cry "woman and children first!" was the heroic act of men fulfilling their natural, God-given duty. It may have not been a ship-load of Christians who went down that night over 100 years ago, but the story of Titanic is still one of heroism, romance, and tragedy. Titanic 100 took a closer look at the word "chivalry" and the bridge spanning modern-day progressivism. It was not a fantasied picture of "Victorian"- Edwardian society. People have always sinned. People have always needed a Savior. Yet there was something special about Titanic--and the men--no matter who they were, no matter what their motives. They left a legacy that CAN be used as an example for today. No agenda there. Sorry, just something I'm a bit hyped about. ;) Will continue with the pictures now.

Friday was quiet. After Thursday's 15 hour drive it was much welcomed. Of course walking into a hotel lobby full of elegantly-costumed people at 1:00 AM is awkward--especially when one has car-hair and is wearing an oversized sweatshirt. But we won't go there. :P Friday we took our time eating breakfast {the hotel offered an all-you-can-eat buffet. Oh yeah, and coffee.} then toured around Branson. Found it all rather boring {wax museums and corny shows. . .yawn.} But there was this shop called The Secret Garden that begged us to check it out, and since there was nothing else to do. . .we did. Mmmm. . .it was a girls paradise--all Victorian-inspired modern clothing. . .lacy and vintagey and poofy and perfect. When I'm rich I'm shopping for all my dresses there. Just sayin'. Later we attended the opening ceremonies, which included a showing of the 1950's film, A Night To Remember. Very emotional. 

Posing with the lovely Long ladies from Marie Madeline Studios! They were so much fun to talk with. See ya gals around Blogger and Pinterest! :) (their Route 66 Pattern is amazing, btw. You absolutely must try it. Because it's the stuff my dream denim skirt is made of. A-not-at-all-thrift store-frumpy denim skirt. Ppls, it's possible. 

So the pics are all mixed up. Try to ignore it and bear with me. Saturday was full to the brim {coffee included.} Bright and early we headed down to the Titanic Museum--which, pause to say, we were supposed to tour Thursday night with our Titanic 100 group. Bought special tickets and everything. Of course we didn't realize this, thinking the tickets could be used at leisure over the weekend. That's why the lobby was full of elegantly costumed people when we arrived. . .but we won't talk about that. ;) ANYWAY--so we tried the museum again. . .alone. Before the tour we were able to attend an hour-long memorial concert, complete with the Springfield orchestra, two choirs, the releasing of white doves, and the lighting of an eternal flame. Extremely gorgeous. . .and almost worth missing Thursday's tour. The museum itself was interesting--very similar to an exhibit that came through our town about 10 years ago. So we'd already seen most of the artifacts. Hey, I brought home my little Captain Smith bear, and the Grand staircase was breathtaking.  

 

 

I don't think it's possible to put Saturday night into words. Or the Branson Belle. Three decks to explore--open air, fly-away hats, hundreds of costumed people, {me included-finally! ;) }white gloves, feathers, dapper coat tails, entertainment and speeches galore. Oh my, and the food! A three-course meal, iced tea, pink lemonade. But the best part was strolling the decks--it was a warm, breezy night--looking out over the black lake, imagining we were fine Edwardian ladies. I could have lived there forever. Really, it's not something I can describe. A little taste of what a 1st class party may have been like exactly 100 years ago, at that very moment. Side-note: it was a blast seeing Charlie Zahm again. Anna and I really enjoyed his concert at the SAICFF. Gotta love good old-fashioned entertainment; he really gets the crowd going!

 

  

Glimpses of the evening's entertainment--inside the showboat, the San Antonio Darlings, and the Third Class Boys, who performed several favorite High King songs. Talk about good taste in music. haha Paddy's Green Shamrock Shore, The Little Beggerman, The Rocky Road to Dublin. . .the lad's would be proud. Off topic, but My Boy's (aka, THK's,) are coming back in July. Can.hardly.wait. o.O 

Sunday. Was sad. For various reasons. But there was a long car ride to look forward to (or not. . .at the 10 hour mark with five more to go things become bleak.) Life is back to it's ho-hum routine. . .nannying, Lemonberry twice a week (or more,) puppy training. Morning coffee remains essential.

Now, the announcements you've been waiting for! LPSoaS will be hosting a giveaway May 14th-28th. Details coming soon. If you are interested in sponsoring an item there is still time. Contact me to participate.

Also, I've decided to separate my posts into specific series--that way my randomness will be contained. :P  Don't worry--there won't be too many changes. But I've noticed that people enjoy "themed" blogs, myself included. At least something with a bit of consistency. I'll be blogging 4-5 times a week, linking up with "Oh, How Pinteresting! Wednesdays," "Awkward and Awesome Thursdays," etc. What do you think? 

Courageous.

"So. Is there ANYONE on facebook NOT hyped about Courageous? (giving everyone a hard time, like the good contrary person I am. :P ) Yes. This is for you {insert name of friend.} And all my other Courageous-crazy friends. Which is my entire friends list. I think. :runs:"  {my facebook status, Oct.}

It started with a random act of facebook-fan-page-liking--the new Sherwood picture, 2011. Ok, nice. I like Sherwood, but really, their movies are so predictable. Dis-functional family; yelling and shouting; disgruntled parents; ignored kids; a series of life-changing events and in the end? = happy home. Predictable. And I wasn't interested. Especially when the random fan-page liking turned into "ohhh, Courageous is FINALLY in the theaters! You just have to see it. I mean, this is supporting Christian film-making!--if you don't see it you aren't fulfilling you're Christian duty, blah blah blah." Very unappetizing. As a pro-contrary-against-the-grain kinda gal, I was so NOT seeing this film. Honestly, it's just a movie! There was no way it could effect my Walk or change my life. (still feel that way. You don't *have* to see Courageous to be a Christian. ;) ) So I went on my happy way. Until I saw a clip that was, well, funny. . .and put together nicely. Professional, even. Then I decided to pop in our copy of Facing the Giants (around the recent time I began liking football. Very radical reformation here, folks!) Made a lot more sense, now knowing something about the game--and I have to admit, I've always loved Flywheel {bad acting and all.} Sherwood was worming it's way back into my heart.

I went and bought Courageous. {miracles still happen. . .this and football combined? I'm starting to see a trend. Maybe I'll love P&P next. NOT!} Two nights ago I watched it. . .my heart is still full. It isn't overrated. It wasn't an overreaction. Courageous seriously is one of the best movies I've ever seen--the simplistic realness, the true life plot, the beautiful blending of family, God, tragedy, triumph. Others have said it--and it's true: I can't remember the last time I've cried that much through a movie. Funny, very emotional, well made, a huge step up on the acting. . .the movie is impressive--it touched my heart and left my mind whirling. It's been the latest topic since Thursday. . .and I plan on showing to my mom tonight. :)

"Four men, one calling: To serve and protect. When tragedy hits home, these men are left wrestling with their hopes, their fears, their faith, their fathering. Can a newfound urgency help these dads draw closer to God...and to their children? Courageous...honor begins at home." 

This is the story of men defending and upholding the law to the best of their ability--but when it comes to personal life at home, they are just every day, mediocre dads--not tyrants, not unloving, just getting by, functioning at the bare minimum of responsibility. It takes the heartrending lose of a child {keep the kleenx handy,} rather than life-risking police work to make these fathers truly "courageous." 

 

It was refreshing to see a Sherwood film focused more generally, ie the average family. There is a bit of something to touch everyone. The message is clear: children without an influential father figure often fall into crime, hatred, sex, suicide, etc. As I watched each scene elapse I thought of my own dad, sitting mere inches away from me, choked up, laughing, fighting back the tears; he's already "signed" the "resolution." Years before Courageous was even thought of. My dad has always been there for me--not simply a shadow creeping home each night, sitting in front of the TV, answering questions,--"there" but not really involved. The Lord has blessed me with a father who has reared me on the Bible--who loves me; is the center of all I do.

 

That's why {:spoiler alert!:} I sobbed when Nate took his daughter Jade out for dinner. He laid down the rules, asked for her promise, told her he would protect her no matter what--that he treasured her. She agreed: her heart was her daddy's. And then. . .Nate pulled from inside his jacket--a ring. Then I lost it. Because that's exactly what my daddy did for me on my 13th birthday. We went out for a "fancy" dinner at the Olive Garden. . .just me and dad. I remember it all like yesterday, and the bond I formed with my father is one I will never forget. He gave me a ring--a beautiful golden "promise," or purity ring, to seal the commitment that I would trust he and mom with my heart--that I would preserve it for the man that will someday be my husband. Then, and only then, will dad leave me in someone else's care. It was all there--it was in Courageous. o.O In a movie seen in theaters all over the country. Majorly amazing. 

 

Ok, so to wind up my "review." It's awesome seeing Independent Christian film-makers proving to the world that yes, movies can be action packed without gore, "language," immorality or other "content." Courageous is PG13, but only because of the intense drama. . .my heart was pounding. Can't have a police movie without a shootout, right? ;) Also loved the surprising twist in the plot line {who would have guessed Shane--ok, ok, I'll stop!} And Javie. . .he was fantastic. His wife could have taken a few acting lessons, but really, I can't complain too much as far as the acting goes. TJ was incredible, and I really, really liked Nate. David's interaction with his little girl just melted my heart. . .and Adam's flashbacks of Emily. :sniff: 

I give it 10 out of 5 stars. Take it from Miss pro-contrary herself. You pretty much need to see Courageous.