Another chapter closed.

2012. In some ways, it was the most life-changing year of my life. So many places, so many faces, so many new, strange, unique, and completely God-made experiences! Those are the memories I want to keep forever. Others, like breakups with friends, hurt and distrust--I've buried. I've surrendered to my Jesus. And that's the miracle of 2012; learning the true meaning of complete surrender.  I'm done with worrying about living my life according to other people's standards; I am me. And I must follow His perfect, unique path for my future.

{via}

That's 2013. An adventure into the unknown. Pages--like my heart put into poetry--blank and waiting to be filled by the Master of life. Aside from the SAICFF (more on that in a minute) I don't have many plans. . . .and it's a little frightening. My heart left the Shire and my comfortable Hobbit hole long ago; The World is Ahead!

{via}

2012. 

--my 21st birthday.  if i could stop time (because seriously, i'm getting old!) i'd stay right here. 21 is somewhere between maturing-young-adult and little girl who doesn't NEED (or want) to grow up. . .yet. and i'm happy that way. 22 will be great, i'm sure. . .but after 22 comes 23. . .then jumps to 25. and right now i don't even want to think 30. (Peter Pan, i'll always love you!) the interesting part of turning 22 is that i'll be celebrating it in TX. and i've already gotten a Kindle Fire HD as an early birthday gift. which is pretty awesome. :)

{taken in MI by my friend Danielle} 

--attended the 2012 San Antonio Independent Christian Film Festival with a whole crew-ful of beautiful people. we drove alll the way from Ohio, and while i'll admit that overnight road-trips and i don't get along, it was one of the best experiences of my life! we sang, talked non-stop, rarely slept, ate nothing but sandwiches, granola bars, and M&M's, cried, laughed, debated, nearly lost the ball-bearings on a tire, stayed overnight in a parking lot (while said tire was being repaired,) ate more M&M's, watched countless movies, sang some more, met hundreds upon hundreds of people, talked a lot, had the van window broken into, danced, ate a few more granola bars, and bonded in the deepest way possible. i love my friends.

--drove down to Branson MO for Vision Forum's Titanic 100. it was a gorgeous event, full of speeches, special music, and a 3-course dinner on the showboat Branson Belle. plus Anna and I got to spend it with our daddy. :)

--lost my precious Banjo-man Nick in June. as some of you probably remember, Nick was the Yorkie i got as a therapy dog--at least, that's what i hoped he'd become. it's still very difficult for me to talk about, and i try NOT to think. putting down my puppy was the worst thing i've ever done--one of the hardest, most challenging decisions of my life. i went through a lot of guilt. i cried until my TMJ flared and my throat was sore. but now, looking back, weighing the facts, and through lots of support from my family, friends, and prayer, i know my decision was the right one.

{Nick in his Christmas jammies, about five months before he died}

i miss you, little buddy. thanks for leaving your squeaky-puppy for me to snuggle. it smells like you, and whenever i see it, i see YOU, scampering in the backyard with your beautiful, silky coat, floppy ears, and a mouthful of squeaky-puppy. ♥

". . .because I knew you. . .I have been changed for good." 

--spent over 2 months sewing a ballgown and all the trimmings for Beyond the Mask, an Independent Christian film by Burns Family Studios. Though extremely challenging, (think layer upon layer of clothing--all authentic, hand-drafted re-productions) working with the Ohio branch of the BTM costume team was hugely rewarding! i learned so much, and while i'm STILL not an expert seamstress. . .the seam-ripper and i aren't on the friendliest terms anymore. WIN! 

 

{sneak-peak of my finished gown. the second picture is post-huge hairstyle. :P }

--went on an epic week-long vacation to North Carolina and my forever-beloved Tennessee. ok, so i had the worst head-cold of my life (curse you, sun-poisoning!) and hardly remember anything about Dollywood. . .but swimming for the first time ever in the real-life Atlantic ocean was total bliss. if that's what you'd like to call being knocked over by every single wave. it's what you get at 4'9. ;)  i loved exploring the tiny, secluded island of Baldhead--where Blackbeard and other pirates supposedly roamed, once upon a time--in a golf cart. that is, Blackbeard wasn't in a golf cart. we were. oh my, but all the little golf-cart garages! sooo adorable. i want one. 

 

  

things to remember on vacation: always, always, ALWAYS wear sunscreen on the beach. otherwise ones knees are prone to turning bright-pink and hurting horribly. and ones face may turn red. and one may get a horrible head-cold. and then one may not be able to properly enjoy cabins-in-the-Smokies and hillbilly bluegrass jams across the NC/VA border. word to the wise.

  

  

{pics by Anna}

--saw my friends and Celtic band The High Kings in concert. again. That makes 7 concerts now. 

 

 {R-Darren (my favorit-est King) gives the BEST squishy-daddy hugs. he's an absolute sweetheart.}

--went to a rodeo for the first time. as in bull-riding. yes, i'm addicted. 

{by Anna}

--lived through another Ohio Summer Rendezvous! it was my third year as main event planner and hostess, and thanks to my co-planners-in-crime, OSR '12 was truly the best yet. 

--worked with the (MI branch) BTM Costume team AND appeared as an extra in the masquerade ball scene. see, this is why i haven't put up a proper BTM post. there was so much beauty in the 9 days we worked in MI, it can't be put into words.

sewing until 7:30 AM. . . root-beer floats at all hours of the night, deadlines, colds, eating way too much, laughing our heads off. seeing set for the first time! o.O i won't even TRY to explain. let's put it this way--i am an incredibly blessed girl. i have bonded with the most incredible people in all the world. i have lived in a household of crazy-amazing young ladies. i have BEEN IN A MOVIE.

and i was hugged twice by John Rhys-Davies. 

the end.

i can't wait to see what God does with BTM--it's hugely fascinating, watching the Independent film movement revolutionize the world.  

{pics my Anna}

to my Beyond the Mask family:

"Now we're back to the beginning

It's just a feeling and no one knows yet

But just because they can't feel it too

Doesn't mean that you have to forget

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger

'Till they're before your eyes

You'll come back when they call you

No need to say goodbye

You'll come back when they call you

No need to say goodbye".

you have no idea how much you mean to me. i love each and every one of you--for your uniqueness, your spirit and love for the Lord. for your purpose and oneness of mind. for embracing me in your circle, even though i knew you for only 9 days. thank you so much! 

{copyright Joe Henline}

And now stretches this white, empty canvas--this thing called 2013. Already I see so many changes. Watching my "little sisters grow up, for example. how does that happen? just a couple weeks ago I had a deep heart-to-heart with my 15 year old sister Julia. Once these chats were secluded to the "older set". Julia isn't a little girl anymore. I've seen--and am seeing--her blossom into a young lady who is smart, thoughtful, sincere, and in ways very above me in maturity. That girl is going to teach me a lot, I can tell. 

{our parents. i'm assuming dad got wet from the fountain. ;) } 

{L-R: me, Julia, Maria, Lidia, Anna}

2013. Who are you? So far we've seen The Hobbit together, I've booked tickets to the SAICFF 2013, I'm turning 22. . .and everything stops there.

Write upon these pages Lord. Make them Yours. I give them to YOU.