Confessions of an anti-Curly Girl / Rambles of a Mocha addict

Hair. There are some days when I hate it - "if I were a man, I would totally grow a long beard and shave my head." It would be so easy. But no. . .bald women are unattractive and pagan-looking. Bummer. So, like EVERY "normal" gal out there, I struggle, fuss over, and bemoan my glory - my hair. . .and yes ladies, if properly cared for, it CAN be glorious.

It all began about a year ago, last summer, to be specific. You can read HERE about my earlier hair-care adventures. Let just say. . . I've come far, very far since then. Not one egg touches my locks nor conditioner penetrate my scalp. No more heavy, stringy gobs of hair. In other words: I am speaking out against the Curly-Girl method of hair care. :nods confidently: For the most part. I still "scrunch" dry my hair, but have since learned through diverse trials that leave-in conditioner and my particular set of hair DO NOT get along. (btw, random side-note, but am I the only  Blogger who must have even paragraphs? I don't like seeing sentences or super long, blank-white spaces. Its a terrible, perfectionist habit.)

Before I continue, I must say that frozen mocha's from Panera Bread are the most divine, chocolaty, coffee-ish, sugary, fattening, beautiful things on the planet. I've never been in love like today. Forget ever eating a solid meal again. . .I could seriously live on those things. Every day. Great for the waistline, might I add- and see my nice, almost even lines? Note the "almost." ;) This is good. This is off topic. Where was I? Ah yes, hair.

So. To begin again. I've always had natural waves. . . they would form into long, loose corkscrews when I was little, and show up throughout my tween years despite the constant brushing and strange need to have completely stick-straight, FLAT-as-a-pancake hair. (Pulled tighter then tight in a ponytail or smooshed under a headband. Terrible look, might I add.  I saw a family picture today from about six years ago. Frightening. . .Thank the Lord adolescence only plagues once in life.) My mom would always shake her head, saying, "but Michaela, hair is *supposed* to have bumps. . .if you'd only let it hang naturally you'd see how pretty it is." Me? Bumpy hair? Absolutely not! Thankfully my eyes were opened to the possibility of actually looking like a decent human being, and my thoughts on "bumpy" hair changed. Now the more "bumps" the merrier! This was the initial reason I permed my hair. . .twice in one week.


To make a long story short, I'm now dealing with and controlling (trying to, at least,) frizzy-ish ends and broken hair. Hey, it almost looks layered! But one thing I have learned - my hair is very much naturally wavy/curly. It just needs gentle treatment and proper care -  something I learned when one day I looked in the mirror and screamed: "I have no hair!"

The culprit? Curly-girl. Or, my bad-interpretation of natural hair care. . .which actually isn't at all natural, since Tresemme conditioner and other hair products are full of nasty chemicals. Girls, if your going to leave conditioner in your hair, please use only very light-weight, specially made leave-in conditioner, or else your hair will thin out. . .scary, yes? 

Rapunzel's plan for natural hair-care {because admit it. . .her hair is just PERFECT.}

• Shampoo is ok. Especially if it contains Rosemary, which is an essential ingredient for damaged, thinned hair. (like the mess of my own.) Avalon Organics Shampoo,Volumizing Rosemary (from Walmart,) is my favorite. It is very gentle, smells lovely, and doesn't contain any nasty chemicals. I can use it several time a week with soft, full, completely beautiful results. With each wash I dollop on a generous  amount of  all-natural, ultra lightweight conditioner, ion Volume Solutions, (Sally's Beauty Supply) which is promptly washed out along with my shampoo. I love it so very much. . . ! 

• Reduce water pressure. Heavy, hot water damages hair. However, I learned through study and a respiratory cold that freezing water is terrible - for your health and hair. Warm water is acceptable and  tolerable during winter weather. (No clogged, impossible-to-breath-through throats!) Turning the shower down/shielding your hair is an easy way to block excess water.  

• Throw away your brushes and combs! If possible, untangle your hair with your fingers. . .this is impossible for some hair types, like my sister Anna's. However it works fine for me, and I rarely need to use my wide-toothed comb. Yes, picks and wooden wide-toothed combs won't tear or damage hair, though picks need to be used very carefully. When my hair absolutely needs combing, out comes the handy-dandy wooden contraption.

• Dry with paper towels. Yes, you read that correctly. For quite some time I used a regular bath towel to dry my hair. . .another reason for hair thinning. Now I "scrunch dry" my hair with wades of paper towels,  though old t-shirts also work. Make sure every drop of water is absorbed. . .

• Gel. Lots of gel - but not too much. Ok, so my gel isn't organic. . .have to look into that. If your going for the curly look, gel helps waves define and keep their shape. But be warned -  too much weighs hair down, giving it that awful, stringy-ended look. 

• Connect to the "canopy" - in other words, the roots. When washing and air drying (after scrunching, of course. Blow-dryers are sinful!) simply flip hair upside down and run, or "shift" your finger from the roots and downward. . .as you slowly work it you'll feel a difference in volume.

• Separate and "lift". To add even more "bounce" or to hide a part, take small sections of hair from the top of your head (while still damp,) and twist into little, raised  knots. . .clip and wait until completely dry. This is really cute if kept in all day. A fun, unique hair-style! See here.

My hair . . this was in San Diego, CA. Ohhhh, the beautiful bay, the boats, the wind blowing through my hair. Divine.

Voila! I'm not a hair-care expert, and I'm still working very slowly to repair the damage I caused. . .I know it'll take much time before my hair is completely vibrant and full again. HOWEVER this method works for me, and it isn't as frightening as it sounds. ;) Oh, but I almost forgot the most important tip of all:

• Hop in car. Drive to Panera Bread. Order a tall, frothy Frozen Mocha. Slowly savor every bad-for-you drop. Repeat. Feel your heart swell with happiness. Recommended: one dose each day.